On online shopping and other things

August 25, 2015 Written By Zasha O'Brien

I refuse to buy clothes online.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not a dinosaur who thinks hackers will steal her credit card details, and I’m not vehemently opposed to the whole capitalist system that is now exploiting the proletariat via the world wide web. I’m your average Uber app-using, discounted-branded-clothes-wearing, kinda tech savvy girl. But I will not buy clothes online.

“Why?”, you ask, frowning in confusion. I roll my eyes at you. Because I don’t know if they will fit.

But, you insist, there are pictures of people wearing them!

True. There are pictures of those clothes being modelled by, well, models. Models who stuff leafy vegetables down their throats all day, or chain smoke to keep the hunger pangs at bay, or do Pilates/Zumba/Krav Maga/other dance+martial arts thingy that I have never heard of, or are just blessed with skinny genes (see what I did there?). Which is why you don’t know what that very item of clothing, you want to add to your shopping cart, is going to look like on a non-gymming, all-food-eating owner of a lovely pair of boobs that spill out of anything less than a D cup.

Image Source

It isn’t just the Forever 21 website that makes you feel like you don’t deserve to have your body or your body type displayed publicly. When was the last time you saw someone not conventionally slim in a commercial for a home loan? A university brochure? Something that isn’t the before picture of a weight loss ad?

 

I celebrated the first time I watched Girls and Lena Dunham stripped down to her tattooed, love-handled naked body with not a thigh gap in sight ; when that same body was embraced by multiple lovers, by her friends, by herself. How refreshingly different that was from Game of Thrones, where all the naked bodies you see are slim and beautiful and strangely (considering everything else is pretty medieval) underarm and pubic hair-free. Or from F.R.I.E.N.D.S., where Fat Monica was constantly made fun of, even by her family and best friend, and eventually became, well, Slim (and by that, beautiful) Monica, because of a guy she liked.

 

The internet is full of people arguing over the finer nuances of what it means to be curvy and bootylicious,;  whether Beyonce’s body is ideal , ; whether Angelina Jolie is anorexic or Nicki Minaj photoshopped her Instagram picture. And then again, the internet is also full of plus-size fashion bloggers, of people celebrating their post-partum, stretchmarked bodies

(http://thehonestbodyproject.com/), of those challenging Victoria’s Secret’s idea of ‘The Perfect Body’, of Hannah Horvath in a mint-green bikini and in quirky, printed rompers.

The fact of the matter is, the world is full of people who may or may not be proportioned like those on the Zara website. And that’s okay. But until I know from a picture whether that pair of jeans is going to stretch when it meets my hips, I’m not buying clothes online.

 

Until then, eBay delivers Lindt to your doorstep.

Image Source

By the way, this is an ad for a website that is claiming to sell the Hannah Horvath bikini. Look at the ad. See the problem?

On online shopping and other things

August 25, 2015 Written By Zasha O'Brien

I refuse to buy clothes online.

Don’t get me wrong. I’m not a dinosaur who thinks hackers will steal her credit card details, and I’m not vehemently opposed to the whole capitalist system that is now exploiting the proletariat via the world wide web. I’m your average Uber app-using, discounted-branded-clothes-wearing, kinda tech savvy girl. But I will not buy clothes online.

“Why?”, you ask, frowning in confusion. I roll my eyes at you. Because I don’t know if they will fit.

But, you insist, there are pictures of people wearing them!

True. There are pictures of those clothes being modelled by, well, models. Models who stuff leafy vegetables down their throats all day, or chain smoke to keep the hunger pangs at bay, or do Pilates/Zumba/Krav Maga/other dance+martial arts thingy that I have never heard of, or are just blessed with skinny genes (see what I did there?). Which is why you don’t know what that very item of clothing, you want to add to your shopping cart, is going to look like on a non-gymming, all-food-eating owner of a lovely pair of boobs that spill out of anything less than a D cup.

Image Source

It isn’t just the Forever 21 website that makes you feel like you don’t deserve to have your body or your body type displayed publicly. When was the last time you saw someone not conventionally slim in a commercial for a home loan? A university brochure? Something that isn’t the before picture of a weight loss ad?

 

I celebrated the first time I watched Girls and Lena Dunham stripped down to her tattooed, love-handled naked body with not a thigh gap in sight ; when that same body was embraced by multiple lovers, by her friends, by herself. How refreshingly different that was from Game of Thrones, where all the naked bodies you see are slim and beautiful and strangely (considering everything else is pretty medieval) underarm and pubic hair-free. Or from F.R.I.E.N.D.S., where Fat Monica was constantly made fun of, even by her family and best friend, and eventually became, well, Slim (and by that, beautiful) Monica, because of a guy she liked.

 

The internet is full of people arguing over the finer nuances of what it means to be curvy and bootylicious,;  whether Beyonce’s body is ideal , ; whether Angelina Jolie is anorexic or Nicki Minaj photoshopped her Instagram picture. And then again, the internet is also full of plus-size fashion bloggers, of people celebrating their post-partum, stretchmarked bodies

(http://thehonestbodyproject.com/), of those challenging Victoria’s Secret’s idea of ‘The Perfect Body’, of Hannah Horvath in a mint-green bikini and in quirky, printed rompers.

The fact of the matter is, the world is full of people who may or may not be proportioned like those on the Zara website. And that’s okay. But until I know from a picture whether that pair of jeans is going to stretch when it meets my hips, I’m not buying clothes online.

 

Until then, eBay delivers Lindt to your doorstep.

Image Source

By the way, this is an ad for a website that is claiming to sell the Hannah Horvath bikini. Look at the ad. See the problem?

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